I would like to make my bio but I have done that so many times and in different places that I have lost the eagerness of doing so again. Instead, I would like to talk about the last couple of days. Some would see it as strife of another sort, I prefer to see all of as a learning experience and something thought provoking.

We have a neighbor here in our complex that is divorced from his wife. She lives not too far from here. Jointly, they created a wonderful son. This boy comes over here a lot as he and my daughter are good, no, best friends. There is sadness in his eyes most times, like a pain or a heart wrench. I don't think even he is aware of that. I know where it comes from.

His father loves him very much and it shows at times. He showers this boy with gifts that either was wished for or was thought of. His mother does the same in not knowing her you would think that she is struggling for his love as his father is. In the way his father talks about her makes it seem that she is certifiable.

The distinct problem is that the boy cannot take whatever gifts given to the other parents place. He goes one week to his father and the other to his mother. I often wonder if he has a home to call his own. In fact, I wonder if he has anything to call his own. His father buys him clothes in which the boy feels uncomfortable in and cannot take it with him to his mother's. This situation is sad; he has nothing to call his own...nothing. He struggles with his self worth and often tells us of things no child must go through or think. My wife and I feel for him but we are powerless...perhaps. We know that whatever changes will come from him, an inner strength called upon. We are worried about him constantly and wonder if he will ever resolve this tearing between his mother and father, both vying for his attention not realizing that they are effectively tearing him apart.

His father does not see past his rage for the woman he regrets of marrying, I wonder if he sees his son as an object to pull and push to get the father's own means. He denies the son whatever the son would like, what he is good at, all because his mother was the one that paid for the activity.

This torments me to see that, I can't even imagine the boy's thoughts.

Recently, my wife and I bought him a bear from Build a Bear Workshop. He chose it and made it and gave it life. He loves that bear from the first time he held it and he couldn't believe how much he could love something. I had tears flowing as I saw myself in this boy hugging that bear and loving it, never letting it go. We told him that this was his bear and no one could take it away, he can bring it wherever he goes...it's his.

When it came time to go to his mother's again, his father withheld the bear as he did with everything else. The boy was silent and said nothing. As my daughter was with him at the mother's house, we got a call of what had transpired. My wife and I finished our business in a neighboring town and quickly went over to the father's apartment to ask for the bear. The father was not happy to comply with my wife pleading for the bear. We explained to him that the bear belonged to the boy and that we had bought it for him. Fits of caged rage was visible as mutterings of him being manipulated rang throughout his apartment as he fetched the bear and threw it at us. No matter, said my wife, we have the bear.

We brought the bear to the boy at his mother's house and the two cried, the bear and he in their reunion. The boy never let go and neither did the bear. The quickly fell asleep with each other.

The father would not talk to us after that, this is day two. I am very angry at him for he does not see what he is doing to his son, the demands he is putting on him. In effect, he is losing him every time they are together on his weeks with him.

My rage, anger and feeling over this situation pales to what the boy must be feeling. I wish I could fix this but I have to solve it within myself that this cannot be fixed with our influence, it must come with the boy.

When will he resolve this and how will this be played? Will he be ready and how will he be affected?

Disturbingly, I don't know these answers.

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